Humour: Viagra Jokes

<div class="guyLifeImageDiv" style="text-align: left;"><img align="middle" alt="undefined" border="0" src="http://idiva.com/media/content/2011/Jul/viagrajokesinline.jpg" style="width: 418px; height: 334px;" title="undefined" /></div> <p>It may be one of the most successful pharmaceutical drugs of all time, but there sure are a lot of jokes out there about the little blue pill. Here are five of the best.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong><br />Supremely Stiff</strong></p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong>Q: </strong>Did you hear about the side-effect Viagra has? </p> <p class="p1"><strong>A: </strong>If you swallow it really slowly you might get a stiff neck.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong><br />Mixing it Up</strong></p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong>Q: </strong>What do you get when you mix Viagra with antidepressants?</p> <p class="p1"><strong>A: </strong>A guy who’s ready to go but doesn’t really care where.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong><br />Disney World</strong></p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong>Q: </strong>Why is Viagra like a crowded amusement park?</p> <p class="p1"><strong>A:</strong> You have to wait an hour for a 3 minute ride.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong><br />Wife vs Maid</strong></p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">A man was prescribed Viagra by his doctor who told him to take it one hour before sex. The man collected his prescription and went home to wait for his wife to get back from work.</p> <p class="p3"> </p> <p class="p1">An hour before she was due home, he took the Viagra pill. But just as he was expecting her, she phoned to say that she wouldn't be in for another two and a half hours.</p> <p class="p3"> </p> <p class="p1">In a panic, he phoned the doctor. "What should I do?" he asked. "I've taken the pill but the effects will have worn off by the time my wife gets home." </p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">"I see," said the doctor. "It is a pity to waste it. Do you have a maid?" "Yes." "Well, could you not occupy yourself with her instead?" </p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">The man was silent for a few seconds, then said "But I never need Viagra with the maid!"</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1"><strong><br />The Old Men and the Viagra</strong></p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">Two elderly men were talking about Viagra. One had never heard of it and asked the other what it was for.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">"It's the greatest invention ever," he said. "It makes you feel like you're young again and puts lead in your pencil like you wouldn't believe" </p> <p class="p1"><br />"Can you get it over the counter?" the Viagra newbie asked.</p> <p class="p2"> </p> <p class="p1">Pat came the reply, "probably--if you took two.”</p><p class="p1"><a href="http://guylife.com/news-lifemore/humour-viagra-jokes/6614">http://guylife.com/</a><br /></p> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/2RKD_3JPfxQ/tech09/5EDg6GPg2wc.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

Humour: Viagra Jokes

It may be one of the most successful pharmaceutical drugs of all time, but there sure are a lot of jokes out there about the little blue ...

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Why did Amy die?

<p><strong>Singer bought <span id="person_link_98168">a</span> cocktail of narcotics:</strong></p> <p>Troubled singer <span id="person_link_1536">Amy Winehouse</span> died on Saturday of a suspected drug overdose at her London home.Sunday tabloids have claimed the singer bought a cocktail of narcotics in the hours leading up to her death. The beehived star had faced a long battle with booze and drugs and once told her former personal assistant Alex Haines that she feared she'd be dead at 27 - like <span id="person_link_18178">Jimi Hendrix</span>, <span id="person_link_7634">Jim Morrison</span>, Janis Joplin and Kurt Cobain. The macabre prediction was made in a 2008 interview by Haines.</p> <p><strong>Was a broken heart to blame?</strong></p> <p>Although no details have been released about the circumstances surrounding her death, the 'Rehab' songstress had a well-documented struggle with drug abuse, and in the days before her death, Amy had also reportedly been in touch with her ex-husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, whom she divorced in 2009. "Amy's been having a hard time lately and she's convinced the only person who could help her is Blake. She thinks he's the only one who understands her and can handle her," said a source close to The Sun.</p> <p><strong>'Ex-husband introduced Amy to drugs'</strong></p> The pair married in May 2007 but divorced two years later after they both battled drink and drug addictions. It is also alleged former music video producer Fielder-Civil was the one who introduced the Back to Black star to heroin and crack cocaine. Amy's father Mitch spoke out about how his daughter stayed away from drugs prior to meeting her ex-husband. In an interview he said: 'He's not entirely responsible, she's got to take a portion of the responsibility, but it's clear, it really kicked off when they got together.<br /><a href="http://www.indiatimes.com/Why-did-Amy-die/Singer-bought-a-cocktail-of-narcotics/photostory/9345931.cms">http://www.indiatimes.com/</a> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/0pT25O-6kIp/tech09/1uuz0wAn7pM.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

Why did Amy die?

Singer bought a cocktail of narcotics: Troubled singer Amy Winehouse died on Saturday of a suspected drug overdose at her London home.Su...

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World's ugliest buildings

<div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Sheffield Hallam University; U.K." border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/9324627.cms" title="Sheffield Hallam University; U.K." width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>Sheffield Hallam University; U.K.<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>Resembling a mash up of a Jiffy Pop package, a salad spinner, and a food processor, this unusual complex was originally built as the National Center for Popular Music. When it closed down after just over a year of business it was sold to Sheffield Hallam University and is now the school's student union.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span> <div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Grand Lisboa Hotel; Macau" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/9324623.cms" title="Grand Lisboa Hotel; Macau" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>Grand Lisboa Hotel; Macau<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>With a solid resemblance to the I Dream of Jeannie lamp, this flashy structure can at least be admired for its campiness. As if it weren't flashy enough as is, the exterior actually lights up with over one million colorful LED lights.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span> <div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="M2 Building; Japan" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/9324616.cms" title="M2 Building; Japan" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>M2 Building; Japan<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>A creation of lauded Japanese architect Kengo Kuma, the M2 is disjointed, depressing, and downright dirty. VirtualTourist.com member "robertbaum" said it all: "The building seems to be used by a funeral service provider."<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span> <div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Spruce Tree Center; Minnesota" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/9324609.cms" title="Spruce Tree Center; Minnesota" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>Spruce Tree Center; Minnesota<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>Proving that it's not easy being green, the Spruce Tree Center is like an 80s version of the Emerald City. Occupying a significant chunk of city real estate, it almost forces residents to look at it.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span> <div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Palace of Justice; Italy" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/9324607.cms" title="Palace of Justice; Italy" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>Palace of Justice; Italy<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>It's almost impossible to believe that the same city that's home to the Uffizi, the Basilica di Santa Maria del Fiore, and the Ponte Vecchio could also be home to this. While it would be a blight almost anywhere, this structure, which looks like three buildings that got into a wreck with each other, seems especially out of place here.</span></div></div></div><br /><span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.indiatimes.com/picture-stories/worlds-ugliest-buildings-/Sheffield-Hallam-University-UK/photostory/9324627.cms">http://www.indiatimes.com/</a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></div></div></div><br /></div></div></div><br /></div></div></div><br /></div></div></div> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/4wLe4x3FovW/tech09/0Aqe1zGENqi.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

World's ugliest buildings

Sheffield Hallam University; U.K. Resembling a mash up of a Jiffy Pop package, a salad spinner, and a food processor, this unusual c...

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The female body shape most men find attractive

A new research has thrown up very interesting things about what body shape in women men prefer the most.<br /><br /><div id="abody" class="articlebody"><div class="parent insert chrome6 single1 float8 cf" style="width:352px;"><div class="child c1 first"><div class="img"><p><img alt="The female body shape most men find attractive" class="img1" height="498" src="http://stbjp.msn.com/i/6F/C6A67A2F4A439466EB2ADE9EEE3A6.jpg" width="348" /></p><p class="abs">"Mad Men" pin-up Christina Hendricks.</p></div></div></div><p>Many women suffer a great deal believing that they're not slim enough to be attractive to men, but as it turns out, all their worries and discomforts are needless, as men prefer a more rounded shape, according to Lavinia Rodriguez, a US clinical psychologist.</p><p>Her study found that men find a greater range of female body shapes attractive than women do, reports the Sydney Morning Herald.</p><p>The body shape that men generally find attractive in women has a waist-to-hip ratio of 0.7. That's the ratio of a 70cm waist and 100cm hips, though the study found that size wasn't as important as the proportions.</p><p>Men like curves. If you doubt it, consider actor Christina Hendricks, who stars in the television series 'Mad Men'. Today's men find her shape incredibly attractive, even though the show is based on 1960's standards.</p><div class="parent insert chrome6 single1 float8 cf" style="width:302px;"><div class="child c1 first"><div class="img"><p><img alt=""Mad Men" pin-up Christina Hendricks." class="img1" height="498" src="http://stbjp.msn.com/i/9A/F0D9169E569618AB76DCC4DEF020F4.jpg" width="298" /></p><p class="abs">Red hot! Christina</p></div></div></div><p>Interestingly, in a study with blind men, the same ratio was found to be most attractive to the males in the study.</p><p>The average man is less bothered by a few extra kilos on a woman than her being what he considers "too thin", they found.</p><p>And so, as the study urges, the best thing for both men and women, is to accept who we are and pursue having the healthiest and fittest body we are naturally capable of achieving.</p><p>We can of course start with letting go of any mistaken ideas of what is attractive to the opposite sex.</p><p>Source: <a href="http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/fashion/article.aspx?cp-documentid=5290757">msn</a></p></div> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/30_IEVwXquM/tech09/1nBk1rHBtqT.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

The female body shape most men find attractive

A new research has thrown up very interesting things about what body shape in women men prefer the most. "Mad Men" pin-up Christin...

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Buy a date with Megan Fox?

<a href="http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/9633162-buy-a-date-with-megan-fox"><img alt="megan fox sexy librarian" class="size-full wp-image-1435 " height="338" src="http://www.meganfox.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/megan_fox_librarian.jpg" title="megan fox sexy librarian" width="458" /></a> <p><span id="more-1425"></span></p> <p>A recent poll revealed that Megan Fox is the one celebrity that most men would like to buy a date with. Megan Fox after being voted the hottest woman in the world topped a poll of over 1,000 people by Madbid.com, a website which auctions off dates with celebrities for charity. And she beats out Angelina Jolie once again.</p> <p>Top 5 women that men want to buy a date with</p> <p>1. Megan Fox<br />2. Cheryl Cole<br />3. Angelina Jolie<br />4. Katie Price<br />5. Madonna</p> <p style="text-align: center;"> </p><div id="attachment_1437" class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 468px"><a href="http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/9633162-buy-a-date-with-megan-fox"><img alt="megan fox topless" class="size-full wp-image-1437" height="338" src="http://www.meganfox.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/megan-fox-topless.jpg" title="megan fox topless" width="458" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">megan fox topless</p></div> <p>Many girl friends wonder what is it that has guys obsessed with Megan Fox. It could be that she is super sexy, admitted in an interview that, “I have the libido of a teenage boy. I’d rather have sex all the time than leave the house.”, or it could be that she tells it like it is and doesn’t hold her toungue. Take your pick but she sure has my vote.</p> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/149qR7e97-x/tech09/2Egc3mPCzNH.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

Buy a date with Megan Fox?

A recent poll revealed that Megan Fox is the one celebrity that most men would like to buy a date with. Megan Fox after being voted the ...

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5 Deadliest Submachine Guns

<div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/2#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/slideonesubmachinegun_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> Invented during World War I, submachine guns have now become an integral part of warfare. These deadly cartridge guns may seem tamer than machine guns at first. However, those who have used these beasts know exactly how wild these weapons can get.<br /><br />Here are the 5 deadliest submachine guns. If you happen to be in the line of fire of any of these, just close your eyes and say your prayers!<br /><br /><div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/3#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/fnp90userconfracto_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> <strong>FN P90</strong><br /><br />Over 200 law enforcement agencies worldwide trust the P90. This weird-looking compact gun was developed in the late 80s primarily for NATO troops. However, it's being used by over 40 countries today.<br /><br />It can shoot 900 rounds per minute and has a muzzle velocity of 715m/s. So if someone's got one of these pointed at you, stay on their good side!<br /><br /><div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/4#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/mp5uncreditedslidetwo_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> <div class="photogallery_desc"><p><strong>MP5</strong><br /><br />This gun was designed during the tense mid-60s in West Germany<strong> </strong>by famous manufacturer Heckler & Koch. The main purpose of this gun back then was to wad off a Commie invasion, but today this gun can be seen in the hands of everyone from the military to well-funded African militia.<br /><br />Its range is about 200m, which makes this an extremely dangerous and effective toy to play with!</p><div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/5#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/uzislidethreegunsdfsf_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> <div class="photogallery_desc"><p><strong>Uzi</strong><br /><br />This open-bolt submachine gun is one of Israel's most significant contributions to modern warfare.<strong> </strong>It was designed by noted gun designer Uziel Gal in 1948 and several of its variants are still in production. This gun can fire 600 rounds per minute and has a muzzle velocity of 400m/s, which you can take to mean as "a LOT."<br /><br />Until recently, this gun was also used by the Special Protection Group, which is responsible for guarding some of India's most powerful people.</p><div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/6#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/ak74slidefourfghjfjdv_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> <strong>AK-74</strong><br /><br />This gun, which is a refined version of the AK-47, was developed in the early 70s. Weighing just over 3 kgs, it has an effective range of up to 600m. The Russians have used this weapon in many of their recent conflicts. In fact, most Eastern European countries still use this gun today.<br /><br /><div class="photogallery_img"> <a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/1#Gallery" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns"><img alt="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" src="http://images.idiva.com/media/photogallery/2011/Jun/thomsonsubmachinegunslidefive_600x450.jpg" title="5 Deadliest Submachine Guns" /></a> </div> <div class="photogallery_desc"><p><strong>Tommy Gun aka Thompson</strong><br /><br />A veteran of several wars, this American gun was designed by<strong> </strong>Brigadier General John T. Thompson in 1919. In a depression-hit United States, the Tommy Gun was the weapon of choice for the armed forces as well as gangsters, who ran amok in an era of utter lawlessness.<br /><br />This gun is in production even today, with several of its variants used by law enforcement and anti-social elements all over the world! Almost 2 million Tommy Guns have been produced till date, and it wouldn't come as a surprise to anyone if this gun has taken more lives than any other--barring the AK-series, of course.<br /></p><p><a href="http://guylife.com/photogallery-machines/5-deadliest-submachine-guns/5733/1">http://guylife.com/</a><br /></p></div><br /></div></div> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/3GXZKF5Q6WP/tech09/4IoVgD05mta.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

5 Deadliest Submachine Guns

Invented during World War I, submachine guns have now become an integral part of warfare. These deadly cartridge guns may seem tamer th...

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Wild & Wacky

<div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="'Riot kiss' goes viral" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/8903133.cms" title="'Riot kiss' goes viral" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>'Riot kiss' goes viral<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>Flanked by police with shields and batons battling a riot following Vancouver's hockey championship loss, a young couple kissed. The striking image taken by photographer Rich Lam has been splashed around the world over the past two days and on June 17, the couple was identified. Lying in the middle of a downtown street in Vancouver was Canadian Alex Thomas and her Australian boyfriend Scott Jones, seen cradling her in his arms and brushing his lips against hers. Scott was comforting her and gave her a kiss to say, 'It's going to be OK,' and the photographer just took the shot at that moment.<br /><br /><br /></span> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Say No to pull up pants!" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/8903130.cms" title="Say No to pull up pants!" width="340" /></div> <h3>Say No to pull up pants!<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>It has emerged that a passenger was deboarded from the plane at San Francisco International Airport and arrested after he refused to pull up his baggy pants. Deshon Marman, 20, was asked to pull up his sagging pants before boarding a US Airways flight to Albuquerque. Marman's pants were reportedly below his waist, exposing much of his boxer shorts. An airline employee asked Marman to pull up his pants at the boarding gate, and the request was repeated aboard the plane, but he refused. At that point he was asked to leave the plane.</span><br /><br /><div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Cat survives 14-storey-fall" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/8903125.cms" title="Cat survives 14-storey-fall" width="340" /></div> <h3>Cat survives 14-storey-fall<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>A cat has incredibly survived the severe consequences of slipping from the 14th floor of her owners’ New York City apartment building. Angela Lang and her family, who moved into the Upper West Side apartment last month, never thought that nine-year-old Copper would be able to slip out of the building through the windows, which hardly opened very wide. But the pet somehow managed to slip out onto a ledge only to fall 14 stories to the street below. When admitted to a local veterinary hospital, the cat not only had survived the ultimate after-effect but also managed to limp away with only a fractured foot.</span><br /><br /><div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Boys vomit to lose weight" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/8903124.cms" title="Boys vomit to lose weight" width="340" /></div> <h3>Boys vomit to lose weight<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>A study of nearly 16,000 schoolchildren has shown that children as young as 10 are making themselves vomit in order to lose weight and the problem is more common in boys than girls. The study of 120 schools, carried out for Taiwan''s Ministry of Education, also found that 16% of the boys made themselves sick, compared with 10% of the girls. The findings also suggest that self-induced vomiting might serve as an early marker for the development of obesity and/or other eating and weight-related problems</span><br /><br /><div class="innerbox"> <div style="width:10px;float:left;"> </div> <div class="storybox"> <div class="stryimg"><img align="left" alt="Teabag & poached egg" border="0" height="308" src="http://www.indiatimes.com/photo/8903122.cms" title="Teabag & poached egg" width="340" /></div> <div class="strytext"> <h3>Teabag & poached egg<span class="stryimgsep"></span></h3><span>It has always been difficult to make a perfect poached egg, but now, the invention of a pouch that is like a teabag, has made it possible. The Poachet, which is made from a semi-permeable papery fabric and allows contact with water, is very different from other poaching devices, which are made from synthetic materials. It works in a similar way to a teabag, and holds the egg in the perfect shape while it cooks. All one has to do is open the Poachet and place it in a small glass, with the open end up, then crack an egg into it, before placing the bag in boiling water.<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.indiatimes.com/picture-stories/wild-wacky/Riot-kiss-goes-viral/photostory/8903133.cms">http://www.indiatimes.com/</a><br /></span></div></div></div><br /></div></div></div> <!-- Below is the AtContent repost button code. Please don't delete or change it in any way. --> <script async="true" src="https://w.atcontent.com/-/2XTHFd808XR/tech09/0eP_zGeAFQM.text/Panel/Autocheck"></script>

Wild & Wacky

'Riot kiss' goes viral Flanked by police with shields and batons battling a riot following Vancouver's hockey champions...

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